British Comedy Season, Pt. 3: Smack the Pony

It's been some time since I've tackled comedy on this blog, but last night I watched some Smack the Pony, and was inspired.

There are still very few all (or most-) women comedy shows around, especially on primetime TV. The reason it took me a while to get acquainted with Smack the Pony was its woefully late airing time. Which it a shame, for STP was the wittiest, most absurd, and definitely the most feminist comedy on Finnish telly at the time.

What I love about the show is its ingenious way of taking everyday situations and turning them into something that could almost happen: having a pregnancy test turn orange instead of blue; taking revenge on your annoying flatmate by mixing washing-up liquid into her yogurt - or, meeting a lexically challenged postgirl:

I think everyone who's ever had to write English can sympathise with her despair over silent Gs, and the irrationality of spelling F with PH.

Another great thing about Smack the Pony are the recurring features, like these deliciously random dating agency videos:

I mean, EGG! who would have a BIG EGG! problem dating her?

All great comedies also have music in them, and STP doesn't let you down in this sense, either. At the end of each episode there is usually a music video parodying some current musical trend, ranging from peppy girl groups to trance. My current favourite, however, is this:

I nearly fall off my chair laughing every time Doon Mackihan comes in with that wonderfully earnest rap voice of hers. Woof-de-woof, indeed.

Pink

Today was one of those rare December days when both the sun and the moon made their appearance - and not just any kind of moon, but a luminous full disk which, coupled with the cold weather, turned the sky (and the landscape) a pale, powdery pink.

More of this, please. This I like much better than the pouring slop we've been subjected to in the past couple of weeks. Instead of wanting to go back to bed at 9am, I'm almost motivated to work again.

Even the downstairs dog looks happier.

Hausfrau-in-Residence

Now and then I'm seized by an urge to do housewifely things  (such as cleaning the windows or mending a sock): a dangerous  occurrence altogether, which usually passes as quickly as it arrived.  Yesterday another such bout came upon me, and I decided to make full use of it. Firstly, I baked a delicious cake (as seen above); then I  hauled my Afghan rug out for a good airing (in which task I was assisted by my landlord's dog, who wanted to give the rug a good shake); and if all this housewifery hadn't been enough, I spent an hour or so wrapping the first Xmas present I'd bought (the results of this endeavour, I guess, cannot be aired in public before the recipient has actually seen them first).

A few years back I picked up an intriguing book at a local fleamarket. It's called Joka naisen niksikirja from 1952. As far as I know, these housewives' manuals have been published since time immemorial, and the Niksikirja something of a institution in Finland (don't know whether any of these editions are still in print). The copy I've got came with extra household tips (cut out from magazines and glued to the covers and empty pages by the previous owner) - and even a letter (remember those?) written in the spring of 1971 by someone called Sylvi. To my disappointment, it doesn't deal with scandal or even the tiniest bit of gossip, but mainly details the various health problems of its writer and her husband.

What fascinates me about this book is (in addition to its dated beauty tips) its emphasis on recycling. Nothing is wasted, be it old socks or leather gloves (the first, among other things, can be used to line a jacket, the latter to make a handy (heh) neckwarmer for winter). Sour milk is still good for cookies, and dried apple peels make refreshing tea.

Nowadays it's harder to make new things from old things. What to do with a burned-up hard drive? How to give a memory stick a new life? Pantyhose, of course, are an inexhaustible source of recycling fun, but surely other clothing items could be recycled as well? I try to mend whatever clothes I can (with my limited skill), but it's just so much easier to throw the old garment away, and buy a new one.

To get you, random reader, into the right spirit of good housekeeping and rejoiceful recycling, here are some miscellaneous vintage tips, gleaned from the treasure trove that is Niksikirja.

• A cup of strong, good coffee makes mutton juicy, and shortens the cooking-time considerably.  I might try this next time I'm cooking mutton.
  
• Velvet can be washed in potato water (1 kg shredded potatoes, 5 litres water).  I'm not sure I'd try this, but sounds intriguing. I wonder who came up with this idea?
• Wet shoes should never be dried with their soles against the floor, but on their sides. Also, filling the shoes with hay or oats dries them quickly.  Sounds like a great idea, but where can I get some oats every time I need to dry a shoe?
• A glass of honey-and-water is wondrously invigorating! Oh, I agree. 
• If you have trouble falling asleep, try eating something. Lingonberries, for example, are very effective against insomnia. What? 
• If you don't have time to wash your hair, you can brush some rye flour into your scalp. Yes, but how do I get it out of my scalp? 
• Walking a sheep on a leash is difficult, but if you rinse its eyes with water, it follows you willingly even for a long distance. Now where can I get a sheep to try this out on?! And what else would you rinse someone's eyes with but water...?
  

Context, Cows and the Capital

I spent the weekend in Helsinki, celebrating Fidia's birthday in the usual manner  (but with fewer films this time) and also doing some work on our webpage with Otter and T. Thus in three days I indulged in catching up with a dozen of friends, eating in a rather fancy restaurant, making and helping to destroy a truly sinful chocolate cake, watching some great films, and - as always with Otter and T, planning a glorious future for SHS.

On Sunday I got treated to a side of Helsinki I rarely encounter - and one I enjoy greatly. As the pictures above show, there is more to our capital than concrete and traffic jams and grumpy people; indeed, it also seems to include cows and fields and friendly dog-owners. If I saw that side of the city more often, I might even get to tentatively like the darn place.

Today's been a cloudy day - both internally and weather-wise. I like the bleakness of October when it coincides so wonderfully with my mental state - which is similarly worn-out but at the same time serene and strangely expectant.

What I'm expecting, of course, is a satisfactory ending to my nearly year-long travail with my Licentiate, which should take place tomorrow. And even more than that I'm looking forward to the big chocolate cake I've been promised. :)

Contributing to my bitter-sweet mood has been Aimee Mann, whose soundscapes are perfect for this season. I love her matter-of-fact delivery and inventive lyrics, especially as they are set to devastatingly gorgeous music. Like so:

Small Budget Charity

Now here's an amusing thing you can do if you've got time on your hands and zero motivation to do any real work. Check out this website. (I found it through her.)

While I don't think that the English language is getting impoverished, or that all these newfangled words are ruining its ages-old beauty, it's nevertheless a nice idea to hang onto some of the older words and expressions - especially if they're useful or poignant or just downright silly.

Here are five words I picked, and have pledged to use as much as I can. I tried to choose words that are genuinely useful (there are lots of words that are very specific, and thus not all that practical for everyday activities like blogging).

Blateration. "blabber, chatter". As in "I couldn't get a word in the edgewise for all the blateration at the meeting."

Foppotee. "a simple-minded person". This is my favourite - mainly because it's meaning is so self-evident. "He's a great foppotee, but I like him nevertheless."

Incabinate. "to enclose or imprison in a cabin." A word of great usefulness in the Finnish summer. "They're planning to incabinate me for two months."

Welmish. "of a pale or sickly colour." While obviously handy when referring to people, somehow I think this word applies very well to animals as well - especially dogs. "The new puppy was cute, but of a strange, welmish colour."

Yelve. "a dung fork." This word has a deliciously Ye Olde Worlde ring to it - and I can't believe that fantasy writers haven't rallied to its defense. "Gandalf was greatly annoyed when the Balrog prodded him in the backside with his yelve."

Mielenmaisema

There's something particularly Finnish about the scenery above, and something that well summarises my current mood. A narrow slice of dirt track bordered by tall trees, meandering deeper into the forest until it meets a lake or another road or a dead-end. Roads like this have always fascinated me; I love their randomness and their prosaic mystery - you never know where you’ll end up when you start following one of them.

That particular road is in Korpilahti; I spent the weekend there at M and J’s house, looking after their animals (two horses and a dog). Or, more precisely, the dog looked after me - she kept following me everywhere and watching my every move. I think she might report to M later.

I really should have got some work done as well, but lately I’ve been feeling acutely unmotivated. Partly this is because my supervisor has (apparently) been ignoring my Licentiate and therefore I don’t quite know how to proceed with my research. So instead I’ve spent the past month travelling around the country and thinking about Renaissance food and frocks.

Which reminds me - the necklaces Otter and I ordered finally arrived. And they are gorgeous. I also got myself a French hood; god knows if it’ll match the dress and the jewellery, but as I’ve set my mind on having one, I really can’t complain. And I suppose I can use it as a sun visor if nothing else goes.

Getting arty

Been doing a lot of writing lately (mainly my licenciate). So here's an arty picture to make up for my silence in the blogging department. The thing in the middle with three white splotches is Ruttu, a teddy bear that followed me home from Yorkshire.

Next week will be a more socially active one. I was promised

1) that I'd get to meet M's new dog
2) that I'd see the wondrous new colour scheme in M's house (lots of yellow, she said)
3) that there will be a new feminist reading group
4) that there will be lots of wine
5) and some coloured paper, glitter, glue and other miscellaneous fun at Otter's place in H.

Looking forward to it.

Wheee!

Last weekend I was in Helsinki, where we celebrated Fidia's birthday in the already traditional way: by watching loads of films (some classics like Kind Hearts and Coronets, and some not-so-classic ones like Hair), eating lots of cake and just generally socialising.

As usual, I had my guitar with me and treated my friends to some Joni Mitchell and other similarly cheerful stuff. It's great fun to play to an appreciative audience, but I hadn't realised just how appreciative they are. Just before I was about to launch into my set, they presented me with a brand new guitar case! It's one of the best presents I've ever got, especially as it comes from so many people, many of whom have been forced to hear my yodelling for years now. And my old case was falling apart at the hinges and was in dire need of replacing.

So thanks, guys! :)

It's a bit hard to get organised after a trip like that. In the next couple of weeks I should wrap up my licenciate, prepare and teach a four-hour session of literacy skills and fill in a few application forms. Should be great fun. But somehow things seem to be going pretty well at the moment, and I'm feeling uncharacteristically confident. Autumn, for some reason, agrees with me.

(In case you're wondering, the dog in the picture above is Olga, my cousing's Bernese mountain dog. A great character. )

Two stories that made my day

I'm fond of dogs, and not all that fond of children. So both of these stories brightened up my day considerably.

First, a link via Kaleidoglide about child-free zones in India. Hope this catches on in this country as well.

Then, a really awwww-inspiring story courtesy of The Cellar , proving that animal welfare isn't just for hippies and batty old ladies: a group of New York bikers who call themselves Rescue Ink have started investigating cases of animal abuse.

Very cute, and very very scary at the same time...